Have you ever eaten an apple that looked perfectly fine on the outside, but to your disgust, was rotten on the inside? You couldn’t have known though, right? Even the apple’s flesh tasted fine – In fact in addition to the red and shiny exterior, the interior was deliciously juicy! In fact, only when you got to the core the apple was rotted and black.
Unfortunately our lives are filled with so many people like these rotten apples. They are so good at making themselves look beautiful on the outside – waxed and buffed to trick you in to biting in to them. They charm you with their perfectly crafted smiles, and know exactly what to say to get you to believe that they are on your side. They continue to be nice to you until you become disposable. Then they will stop making the effort and stick a knife in your back the moment you turn around.
That is just how some people are. They are incapable of being unselfish, and have no regard for others.
If you’ve ever done first year psychology at uni, I’m sure you’ll be familiar with Piaget’s theory of the stages of development. Up until the age of roughly about seven, we are at a “pre-operational” stage. One characteristic of this stage is having an egocentric view of the world. Having an egocentric perspective means you are only able to consider things from your own point of view and you imagine that everyone shares this view, because it is the only one possible. Some people are just stuck at this stage- perhaps because their parents enabled them to avoid decentering.
And that is part of what makes these people rotten at the core.
So how can you avoid said people?
Well unfortunately my friends, there is no way of getting rid of these people from our lives. They are omnipresent and lurk in every corner of your uni life, your work place, and even in your place of worship.
The best, and only, way is to approach people with caution. Don’t bite in to the apple until you’ve cut it in half to check the core.
There’s a difference between being polite, and being open and trusting to someone.
You can smile and exchange pleasantries with whomever you want, but when it comes to trusting someone, don’t base the trust on wide smiles, gleaming teeth, and a great sense of humour.
Buyers beware: Withhold all trust until you’ve spent a good amount of time getting to know someone based on one on one time with them. Because it is outside of large groups these people show their true colours.