I’m not really good at getting close to people. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable.
I think the reason why I switched coffee stores in the first place was because they were getting way too familiar… The workers were coming to the dental clinic I work at… the boss (who also works there taking orders), knew my name… the barista made my coffee before I even ordered it at the counter…
Now this new place also knows my order as soon as I walk through the door. She’s written “SKL” (Large skim latte) on the coffee lid before I open my mouth. I’ve got a $20 note in my hand, so she asks “and the Portuguese chicken wrap too?”.
These encounters make me borderline uncomfortable… But still bearable. But lately I’ve been saving my coffee for lunchtimes. And at lunchtime, the cafe isn’t as busy. So what does the barista do? She starts a conversation with me. We have a conversation about my contacts, laser eye surgery, and meanwhile I’m getting increasingly uncomfortable.
I’m not ranting about all this because I think there’s anything wrong with me.
No, not at all.
I’m just an introvert. I like keeping to myself. I don’t like small talk.
I don’t like being asked about how my day is going because I really don’t believe the barista, or the shop assistant, or the bank teller, gives a damn. They smile, make conversation, and act like they care, because it’s all part of their “excellent customer service”. I would know – I do it at work.
When I’m not working, I just want everyone to shut the damn up.
I want everyone to mind their own business, because I’m too busy minding my own damn business. So is it too much to ask for, to be able to just get my coffee, and get out?
If I think we’re meant to be friends, then I will converse with you about all the wonderful things we share an interest in.
For the mean time, just leave. Me. Alone.